I'm 16 years old. I run a 7-person web design venture. I have a contract with Physics Wallah that I signed at 15. I sold my first blog for ₹12,000 when other kids my age were still figuring out Instagram filters. And I'm absolutely terrified that I'm wasting all of it.
The Laptop That Changed Everything (And Nothing)
Three years ago, my father bought me a laptop on EMI.
Let me tell you what that means in a middle-class Indian household where your father just lost his job: It means he believed in something he couldn't see. It means he took a bet on a 12-year-old kid who said, "Papa, I want to learn."
That laptop—the one I'm typing this on right now—cost less than what some kids spend on a weekend trip. But to my father, it was a installment payment every month. A reminder that someone was counting on me to make it worth it.
I taught myself everything on this machine. Graphic design from YouTube tutorials at 2 AM. Web development from free courses I'd pirate because we couldn't afford subscriptions. Business from watching founder interviews and pretending I understood half of what they said.
At 14, I sold my first blog for ₹12,000. I remember calling my father and hearing the pride in his voice—the kind of pride that makes you want to cry and work harder at the same time.
At 15, I signed a 16-page contract with Physics Wallah as a graphic designer. I got my email verified on LinkedIn with their official domain. I felt like I had made it.
Except I hadn't made anything. Not really.
The Comparison That's Killing Me
Today, I heard a speech by Raul John Aju. He's 16, like me. Except he's been getting "exposure" since he was 4 years old. Pranjali Awasthi is the same—building companies, speaking on stages, probably sleeping 8 hours a night because her life isn't divided between school hell and survival mode.
And I feel something I hate admitting: jealousy.
Not because of what they've achieved. I'm genuinely proud of them—they're representing our country on a global stage, and that matters.
I'm jealous because they got to start at 4 with resources, tutors, and networks, while I got my first real tool at 12. Because they don't have to wake up at 6 AM for a school system that teaches nothing, managed by teachers who genuinely believe 3-6 hours of sleep is "enough to be successful."
Because they're not stuck in this loop where 75% attendance is mandatory, even though everyone knows the real learning happens outside those walls.
I'm jealous because they're building their empires while I'm just trying to stay awake.
The Hell Loop I'm Stuck In
Here's what my life looks like right now:
I sleep at 11 PM (if I'm lucky) and wake up at 6 AM. That's 7 hours, not the 9-10 my teenage brain desperately needs. I drag myself to school, where I spend 10+ hours in a building where I don't actually learn anything valuable. I come home at 3 PM, so drained that if I lie down for even a second, I'll sleep for hours.
But I can't sleep. Because I have:
- Board exam prep (I need 90%+ to make my parents proud)
- IKG Web Creations (my venture with 6 friends, where my father invested ₹6,000)
- Physics Wallah graphic design work.
- Personal branding on LinkedIn and Instagram (because "exposure," right?)
- The desperate, crushing need to prove that the laptop bought on EMI was worth every rupee
You know what sleep deprivation does to you?
It doesn't hit you on day one. For the first week, you feel fine—tired, but functional. By day 15, everything changes. Your ability to think critically just... disappears. You can't react calmly to problems. You have zero patience for your work or the results. You become the worst version of yourself, and you don't even realize it until you get a long weekend and sleep 9 hours and suddenly feel like a different person.
I know all this because I'm a nerd about sleep science. I follow Bryan Johnson. I've read the research. I understand that chronic sleep deprivation is destroying my cognitive function, my decision-making, my health.
And I'm doing it anyway because I don't see another choice.
The Money That Haunts Me
In 2024, my father invested ₹6,005 in a dropshipping venture I wanted to try. We lost every rupee.
He didn't say a word. Just nodded when I told him it failed and asked what I learned.
Now he's invested ₹6,000 in IKG Web Creations. We're building 6 websites, waiting on AdSense approval. If this works, I'll make ₹3 lakh by July 2026. If it doesn't, that's another ₹6,000 of my father's trust that I couldn't convert into results.
Do you know what it's like to carry that weight?
My father lost his job in 2023. Our "financial conditions are not so good" is the understatement I tell people when I don't want to explain that every rupee counts, that an EMI laptop was a sacrifice, that ₹6,000 isn't just money—it's belief.
I can't fail him again. I won't.
Except right now, I'm failing myself. Because I'm choosing sleep deprivation over strategy. I'm choosing "hustle" over health. I'm choosing to be busy over being effective.
The Dream That Feels Impossible
There's a college called TETR. Four years, travel to 7-12 countries, full entrepreneurship focus. It costs ₹50 lakhs per year. They give 60 scholarships annually to kids who show "entrepreneurial abilities and mindset."
I want that. Badly.
To afford it without a scholarship, I'd need to earn ₹60 lakhs per year by age 18. That's ₹5 lakhs per month, sustained. Right now, I'm at PW, maybe ₹3 lakhs total by July 2026 if IKG succeeds.
The math doesn't work. I know this. But I can't stop thinking: What if I just work harder? What if I sleep less? What if I'm just not good enough yet?
And then I remember: I'm 16. I'm running on 6 hours of sleep. I'm operating at 60% capacity and wondering why I'm not performing like someone at 100%.
The Decision I'm Terrified to Make
I have a ChatGPT conversation saved on my laptop. In it, someone told me something I didn't want to hear:
"You need to pause. Sleep 8-10 hours. Focus on boards for 4 months. Everything else can wait."
Every logical part of my brain knows this is right. I'll score 90%+ if I'm rested. IKG can run with 10 hours per week from me. My father will be prouder of a healthy son with good grades than a burned-out son with mediocre results and ₹1.8 lakhs.
But the terrified part of my brain screams: What if I pause and 2027 ends with no money? What if this is my only window? What if Raul and Pranjali are building empires right now while I'm sleeping?
I'm scared that if I stop, I'll lose momentum. That I'll wake up at 18 with nothing to show for these years. That the laptop bought on EMI will have been wasted on someone who almost made it but chose comfort over ambition.
What I Actually Want (If I'm Honest)
I don't want to be viral on Instagram. That's just me looking for validation that I'm "keeping up."
I don't need ₹60 lakhs per year by 18. That's just a number I'm chasing because it feels like "enough."
What I actually want is simpler and harder:
I want to make ₹1 lakh per month so my family is comfortable and I can focus on growing without constant financial anxiety.
I want to build something—a brand, a business, a legacy—that makes my father look at that EMI receipt and think, "Best decision I ever made."
I want to prove that kids from small towns with borrowed laptops can compete with kids who had tutors at age 4.
And I want to do all of this without destroying my health in the process.
That last one is the hardest. Because right now, I'm choosing everything except my health.
The Path Forward (I Think)
Here's what I'm committing to, even though it terrifies me:
1. I'm going to sleep 8 hours minimum starting tonight. Not because I want to, but because operating at 60% capacity is a worse business decision than pausing Instagram.
2. I'm giving IKG 10 hours per week until December 25. If AdSense approves, great. If not, I pause. I will not throw good time after bad money.
3. I'm pausing Physics Wallah work, Instagram, and everything else that isn't IKG or board prep until March 2026. Four months. That's it. Not forever. Just long enough to build a foundation that won't crumble.
4. I'm aiming for 90%+ in 10th boards. Not because the system is good, but because it matters to my parents and because good scores open doors I might want later.
5. After boards, I'm doing non-schooling for 11th. No more 6:30 AM wake-ups. No more 75% attendance hell. Just me, my laptop, and 10 hours of sleep every night.
6. By July 2026, I'll either have ₹3 lakhs from IKG or I'll have earned it through high-value freelancing. Either way, I'm launching my brand. Either way, I'm moving forward.
7. By age 18, I'm targeting ₹2-3 lakhs per month. Not ₹5 lakhs. Not ₹60 lakhs per year. Something sustainable that I can build without burning out.
If that gets me into TETR, incredible. If not, I'll build something bigger than TETR would have taught me anyway.
Why I'm Writing This
I'm writing this because I need to document this moment. The moment where I'm standing at a crossroads between "hustle yourself into the ground" and "build something sustainable."
I'm writing this because when I'm 25, I want to look back and remember what it felt like to be 16, exhausted, jealous of kids with more resources, and still choosing to keep going.
I'm writing this because somewhere out there, there's another kid in a small town with a laptop their parents bought on EMI, wondering if they're behind. And I want them to know: You're not behind. You're on a different track. And your story—the one where you started with nothing and built anyway—is the one that actually matters.
I'm writing this because my father believed in me when he had every reason not to. And I want to believe in myself the same way.
The Question I'm Asking You
If you've read this far, you're probably one of two types of people:
Type 1: You're like me. Tired, ambitious, scared you're wasting your potential, comparing yourself to people who started with more.
Type 2: You're further ahead. You've already made it, or you're close, and you remember what this felt like.
Either way, I have a question:
Am I making the right call? Pausing for 4 months to sleep, focus, and build a real foundation—or am I just making excuses?
Drop a comment. Tell me your story. Tell me if you've been here. Tell me if slowing down ever actually worked, or if I'm about to make the biggest mistake of my life.
Because right now, I'm choosing to believe that the best business decision I can make is to sleep 8 hours, score 90% in boards, and start my real sprint in April 2026 when I have full control of my time.
But I'm still terrified I'm wrong.
To My Father (If You Ever Read This)
Papa, you bought me a laptop. You invested in dropshipping when it failed. You put ₹6,000 into IKG when I asked, no questions.
I don't say this enough, but I see it. I see every sacrifice. I see every installment payment. I see the belief even when I don't believe in myself.
I'm pausing some things for the next 4 months. Not because I'm giving up, but because I want to build something that lasts. Something that makes that laptop worth every rupee, every EMI, every moment you chose to believe in a 12-year-old kid with big dreams and no proof.
I'm going to make you proud. Not by burning out at 16, but by building smart at 17, 18, 25, 40.
Thank you for the laptop. Thank you for the belief.
I won't waste either.
- A 16-year-old with a laptop bought on EMI and dreams too big for a small town
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